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Vulnerability....weakness or strength?

Be yourself or be someone else . Feeling vulnerable when we show ourselves to the world of our purest emotions, real characters, unique personalities, and simply being  ourselves doesn't always feel good. It doesn't feel good on most occasions. Loving it when the IG likes play your favorite notification sound. Hating it when the phone isn't silent but the notifications are. We are comfortable with company around until we see our faces and flesh in the mirror. It feels great when we are loved by everyone and as soon as we are without company, a feeling of emptiness emerges. Before receiving acceptance from others, there is the first stage of self-acceptance. Accepting your so-called flaws, abnormal physicality, or unpopular traits is HARD, but all it takes is to take the FIRST STEP. It may take a few days, a couple of weeks, or years, but it may take less than a second when deciding to not give a ____ and just to love yourself.    Why do we shy away from our deepest...
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You > Mistake > Failure #2 (Perspective)

Putting crazy pressure on myself didn't do any good. Hiding away all the stress and emotional breakdowns did more harm than expected. To sum up all my thoughts, I'm glad I went through not-so-great experiences in my life thus far.  Internally, I felt that I wasn't ready for high school because I didn't want to go through the unexpected loneliness. Putting myself in a new environment was tough when making new friends was the most difficult part. I wanted to go back to playing basketball during lunch break with all my buddies. I wanted to travel back in time and set my eighth grade year on replay. Externally, I always wanted to be in the mix of trends. If I saw my peers wearing the coolest clothes or the "hypebeast" shoes, I wanted to follow in their footsteps. Learning what popularity in high school meant was kind of a shocking lesson. I though if you were popular, you could make friends easily. If you weren't popular, nobody would want to talk to you...
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You > Mistake > Failure #1

F ***ing up   A dark hole   I 'm lost     L oser     U are ???       R eady to fail again       E xplosion This moment. THE MOMENT. You might have heard it before, I know I sure did. "Learn from your mistakes" seems so manifestly but from my experiences, it's not.     Let's admit it. I make mistakes on a regular basis. Sometimes it's easy to admit that things aren't always perfect. However, at other times, life gets on a roller coaster ride. During those moments, the "thing" I failed to execute grew into something undetectable. Sooner or later, my mistake had the ability to identify a vulnerable teenager as the FAILURE himself.        The next stage is always the hardest because it's recognized to be the UNKNOWN. When you begin to appreciate your self-worth less and less, you feel like the staircase in front of you, the answer to your questions, is breaking apart. W...
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Introductions

Hi everyone. I'm Peter Khant, a senior attending San Gabriel High. I've always had a passion to pursue writing and storytelling, but it seems that I've never created the opportunity to do so. Before graduating high school and moving onto the next chapter of my life, I hope to "walk the walk", and from here on, this is my story.  More to come soon... P.S. I'm not a professional writer, but I'm a writer :) .
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